You noticed that the behavior of your 10 -year old son John has changed a lot in the last few weeks. He does not want to go to school anymore and regularly complains about stomach pains and sickness in the morning. He has not been invited to any birthday parties this year, although he received many birthday party invitations last year. You suspect that John might be bullied by his classmates.
How do you react?
If your suspicions about your child’s being bullied are substantiated, you should act straight away!
This is what you can do:
- Instances of bullying in school should be resolved where they arise. Talk to your child’s teacher, a social worker or a school counselor, about your concerns. Ask the teacher or school officials how they propose to address this case of bullying. Other people that you might involve as well include the school principal or the school psychologist.
- Make it clear to your child: “We will pursue a resolution of this issue for as long as it takes to ensure that you are going to feel better again”.
- Make sure that the enjoyable and positive aspects of your child’s daily life are not negatively impacted. It is important that he feels “I am supported by people who love and value me and enjoy being with me. I am important to these individuals, and this strengthens me. Despite everything, there are still many things in my life that I can enjoy.”
„Talking with kids about bullying” is based on the following references:
1 Heueck-Mauss, Doris. 2016. So rede ich richtig mit meinem Kind: Wie Worte wirken: Konflikte fair lösen: Stressfreier erziehen. Hannover: Humboldt, 3
2 Heueck-Mauss, Doris. 2016. So rede ich richtig mit meinem Kind: Wie Worte wirken: Konflikte fair lösen: Stressfreier erziehen. Hannover: Humboldt, 44
3 Gordon, Thomas. 2012. Familienkonferenz. Die Lösung von Konflikten zwischen Eltern und Kind. 3. Aufl. München: Heyne, 143 ff
Gordon, Thomas. 2012. Familienkonferenz. Die Lösung von Konflikten zwischen Eltern und Kind. 3. Aufl. München: Heyne.
Grolimund, Fabian. 2016. «… und alle schauen weg.» Das Schweizer Elternmagazin Fritz und Fränzi, September, 11-27.
Grolimund, Fabian und Stefanie Rietzler. 2016. «Mein Kind wird gemobbt. Und jetzt?» Das Schweizer Elternmagazin Fritz und Fränzi, September, 32-33.
Heueck-Mauss, Doris. 2016. So rede ich richtig mit meinem Kind: Wie Worte wirken: Konflikte fair lösen: Stressfreier erziehen. Hannover: Humboldt, 25 ff.
Watzlawick, Paul, Janet H. Beavin und Don D. Jackson.2017. Menschliche Kommunikation – Formen, Störungen, Paradoxien. 13. Aufl. Bern: Hogrefe.
Zimet, Nadine. 2015. «Einen Konflikt ohne Strafe austragen- ein Beispiel.» Das Schweizer Elternmagazin Fritz und Fränzi, Dezember. retrieved 22.03.2019.
https://www.fritzundfraenzi.ch/erziehung/elternbildung/einen-konflikt-ohne-strafe-austragen-ein-beispiel
